Wednesday, April 04, 2007


A grand theft has occurred in Annapolis. We suspected that Martin O'Malley was on crack. The evidence to support this supposition is the fact that he supports giving in-state tuition for criminals, he supports giving convicted felons the right to vote (only because they vote Democratic), and he seems stunned that the electric rate is going up 58% in June, just like he agreed to before the election.

Now, the crack pipe has been passed to Baltimore City. The city council is considering passing a bill that if the police were called to your residence two times for noise disturbance, you can be kicked out of your house for up to a year - even if you own your home. To make matters worse, the decibels level of the noise disturbance does not have to be any higher than 55 decibels to warrant an arrest. For those of you who went to Baltimore City schools, a decibel is a measurement of sound.

How loud is 55 decibels? A jet engine is 160. A rock concert is 140. Power tools average about 110. A busy street is around 65. Face-to-face conversation is 55. A quiet office is 50. So, if you have a vindictive neighbor, they're going to call the police on you for having a conversation in your back yard. Small children will be run out of the city. Barking dogs will be arrested. I wonder if this new law will allow the police to arrest those noisy rats you see running down Orleans street. Noisy garbage trucks - yeah they'll be a thing of the past. Construction - too noisy. What if you live next to a fire department? Can you call and complain that they're being too noisy? Those noisy stadiums need to go.

Here's the plan - everyone in Baltimore (the ones that can read) - call the police and complain about the noise levels at these people's houses: Sheila Dixon, Mary Pat Clark, and Stephanie Rawlings-Blake. Wait two days, then call again. We will continue this list with other nuisance politicians until we have kicked them all out of the city.

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