No, it actually looks like deer season. And the road is seasoned with deer carcasses. I passed 3 of them on the way to work this morning. What a way to die. You are running at full speed across a road and you have no idea why.
Ever see something chasing that deer? It's not like there are packs of wolves roaming the suburbs of Baltimore striking fear into the meandering foragers. There are no deer-eating rabbits spooking them into the streets. Why are deer so stupid?
And it's not like they just get hit by the car and die. They lose limbs in the process. You know the deer I'm talking about. The one without one of his hind-quarters. I guess when you have legs like pixie-sticks, they tend to get ripped off when 45 pounds of fuzzy stupidity meet the 4500 lbs of velocity of a Toyota Highlander.
And why are their tongues always hanging out? Have you ever seen a deer while it's alive with its tongue hanging out like a horny panting dog? No. But every dead deer is licking the road with it's purplish grey tongue. Perhaps it becomes unhinged on impact.
And always remember - deer travel in packs. If one stupid deer runs in front of your car, beware, there are usually one or two more right behind it - chasing it for reasons they don't know.
1 comment:
This post made me sad.
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