Martin O'Malley's Tax Alphabet Soup

The sheer number of tax and fee increases under Governor O'Malley is astonishing.  I could make several bowls of tax and fee alphabet soup, but decided to make just one.  Amazingly I was able to find a tax for almost every letter of the alphabet.  Which one is your favorite tax or fee increase?

A - alcoholic beverage tax increase of 50%

B - Birth Certificate fee increased 100%

C - Certification fee for vehicles increased by 100%

D - Death Certificate fee increased by 100%

E - Electricity rates increased to subsidize off-shore wind farms

F - Fishing license increase of 100%

G - Gas tax that is regressive to re-fund the Transportation Trust Fund that he depleted

H - Handgun licensing fee

I - Income tax increase to middle-class Marylanders

J - we're not Joking, this is a lot of taxes.

K - estimated number of people Killed in Maryland since O'Malley became governor is 2,500.  That's 2,500 people no-longer paying taxes.

L - license plate fee increase of 100% for vanity plates

M - motor vehicle dealer processing charge

N - Non-cigarette tax increase of 100% on snuff and cigars

O - Out-of-State Attorney admission fee

P - property tax increase

Q - Quit taxing us so much or we're moving to Delaware.

R - Rain Tax

S - Sales tax increase of 20% when he took office

T - toll increases of 33% at bridges and tunnels in Maryland

U -unclogged - 29,579 miles of roads that have not been unclogged despite O'Malley claiming he supports investments in public transportation.  No new public transportation projects have been completed since he became governor.

V - Vehicle Registration Surcharge

W - Wholesale tax to gasoline that was newly applied

X - x-businesses in Maryland total 3,500 since O'Malley became Governor.

Y - Yikes, more taxes are on the way if Tony Brown becomes Govenor.

Z - Zebra tax - 200% increase in tax to transport zebras across state lines. (not real)

Happy New Taxes Day!

Today, July 1st, is the first day of some new taxes in Maryland.  You know Martin O'Malley is so giddy with excitement that he is running around the Governor's mansion in his footy pajamas doing the happy dance today.

Every year brings more new taxes, fees, and tax increases in Maryland.  This year is no different.  The most well known is the new gas tax.  The gas tax will rise from 23.5 cents per gallon to 27 cents per gallon, an increase of nearly 15%.  And it gets better!  The gas tax will increase every year through at least 2016.  I think I heard that by 2016 a gallon of gas in Maryland will be $4 billion.

Of course, the gas tax increase will boost the revenue stream intended to replenish the Transportation Fund.  This, of course, is what Maryland politicians raid when they need more money to spend on pet projects.  The problem is that O'Malley nearly depleted the fund and now there is not enough money to buy buses or pretend to build new subway lines.  O'Malley has spent $868 Billion from the Transportation Fund in the past 7 years.  Once replenished, there will be plenty of money for Governor O'Malley or the future Governor Tony Brown to raid and spend on windmills in the ocean or checker Eastern Shore with state-owned solar panels.

In addition to the gas tax increase, O'Malley and his zombie cohorts in the Maryland General Assembly have raised the tolls on Maryland's bridges and tunnels, not to mention they starred in the new hit zombie television show (I think).  The two harbor tunnels increase their tolls by 33%, going from $3 to $4 per pass. The Susquehanna River bridges, both I-95 and Route 40, also increase 33% from $6 to $8, though O'Malley's fellow travelers only have to pay those tolls one way.  Finally, the Chesapeake Bay Bridge, or more accurately, the William Preston Lane Memorial Bridge increases 33% from $4 to $6, and the Harry Nice bridge, which is Route 301 over the Potomac River in Southern Maryland, also increase 33% fro $4 to $6.

Another lesser known tax is that people seeking to rent motorcycles in Maryland will now pay a 11.5% tax, an increase of nearly 92%.

Welcome to Maryland!  What's in your wallet?

O'Malley Wants You to Pay 64% More In Gas Taxes

Maryland Governor Martin O'Malley, never one to shy away from more taxes, is reviewing a menu of taxes increases proposed by his own "Blue Ribbon" commission to close the state's structural deficit that he created. The tax increases include a nearly 64% increase in the gas tax (raising it from 23.5 cents per gallon to 38.5 cents gallon), increasing car registration fees by 50%, and bus and rail fee increases.

Why so many surprising new taxes? Ha-ha. These aren't surprising. Every logical thinking person knew that if O'Malley got elected he would ratchet-up state spending and raid the Transportation Fund to pay for it (because he could do that). He would then go back to the voters whining and crying how we have no money to fix bridges and roads, but if we could all do our fair share and accept massive tax increases, then our investments would be worth it.

I don't know about you, but I'm tired of our elected officials raiding the Transportation Fund to pay for their pet projects. Republican Bob Ehrlich did it. I believe former Governor and New York-born Paris "My Wife is My Son's Age" Glendening did it. Martin O'Malley certainly has done it.

These tax proposals, which are all but sure to be passed by the short-sighted Maryland General Assembly, would raise an estimated $870 million annually, that is until they raise the taxes even more. And that's not all that unrealistic. The state wants to spend another $12 BILLION on more transportation projects. I don't think this includes replacing bridges and paving roads. This is additional spending: Purple Line in D.C. suburbs, the Red Line in Baltimore, etc...

And what's with this "Blue Ribbon" designation? Just throw some fancy adjectives in front of your commissions' name and make it sound more important? If you appoint the members, aren't they pretty much going to do what you tell them to do? "I appointed a Blue Ribbon Commission to determine who the most awesome political blogger is. Much to my surprised, they picked me!" "I appointed a Blue Ribbon commission to evaluate state spending and what to do about funding the depleted Transportation Fund and they recommended massive regressive tax increases that will hurt lower and middle income families the most."

So how many more years of O'Malley? How many more taxes can he raise? If you're keeping track, he's raised the sales tax by 20%, he pushed for massive fee increases to use the state's bridges and tunnels, a 50% increase in the alcohol tax, the cigarette tax increase, a 50% increase in many of the fishing and hunting license fees (which O'Malley said was a modest increase). The funny thing about the increase in fishing license fees is that after the state increased the fee, fewer fisherman applied for the annual license and the state actually took in LESS revenue.

So here we go again. More taxes. More O'Malley. There's many more things he could tax, I guess. So I guess I better stop complaining. I will go pump up the tires in my bike now.

O'Malley to the Rescue!

If you've been keeping up with the news, then you're quite familiar with O'Malley's daily tax proposal. These tax increases include the following:

1) Increase the sales tax by 20% - this is a regressive tax that will slam the poor and middle class hard. However, since O'Malley is so pretty, he knows that you'll still vote for him in the next election.

2) Increase the cigarette tax. As we know, the working poor live and breathe (literally) on their cigs, hon. Now, instead of choosing between eating lunch or buying a pack of cigs, the poor and unintelligent will get to choose between their evening 40 & Funions and their cigs. Unfortunately for O'Malley's rhetoric, most rich people are also smart and know that smoking is stupid - just like O'Malley.

Ironically, their are ads on the radio narrated by a really obnoxious mommy-liberal advocating for the increase in the cig tax because it will reduce smoking and generate more revenue for health care. How can smoking less generate more revenue when you're not buying as much? Oh, yeah. That dumb Law of Supply and Demand is a farce.

3) O'Malley wants to increase the tax on vehicle registration titles by 20%. Again, this is a regressive tax that will hit the poor and working middle class harder than the rich. Consider this - rich people are more likely to pay cash for their vehicles. Therefore, they will cover the 20% increase up front. However, the poor and hard working families of Maryland are more likely to finance the car, including the vehicle tax, thus subjecting the 20% increase to an even bigger increase once they factor in the interest.

4) We caught glimpses of O'Malley whining in some family's kitchen claiming that these "table talks" will help brainwash the voters and convince them that these taxes are a good thing.

Another tax introduced was a gas tax. Since gas isn't already expensive enough (and much higher in Maryland than in many other states), he thought it would be a great idea to charge more for the gas. And who uses more gas - the rich or the poor? Surprisingly, they use the same!!!

So who is more affected? The working poor families. Now families will struggle to decide if they should fill their car with gas or buy food, medicine, or diapers for their children. This is definitely a regressive tax. How are those rich people fairing so far? Not too bad!

5) Marty also wants to increase the income tax. This tax, he claims, will be progressive. Interesting choice of words. How can taking more money from people imply progress? Anyway, the rich have the ability to hire CPA's who can hide their income. Rich people can incorporate and have the company pay expenses for them. They don't have to take a salary and be subject to the income tax.

Furthermore, if you have a lot of money, that doesn't necessarily mean that you have high income. You can be living off of the dividends and account balances of your fortune. And with higher taxes, what's the incentive for investing their money? We all know that investing money helps to create jobs, but that's counter intuitive to O'Malley's new Socialist world order.

So in the end, hard working 2-income families are the ones that are going to pony-up paying for unnecessary services that help get politicians reelected.

6) The Slippery Leprechaun also wants to restructure the "antiquated" tax structure. Currently, only goods are taxed. He also wants to tap that treasure of services. This will help generated millions more in tax revenue that he can use to force more government programs down our throats or send to the Baltimore City School system so that they can lose it again. (please ignore the studies that show that miserable failing city schools receive more money per student than successful schools in the suburbs)

7) Companies are a pain in the butt in the state of Maryland and O'Malley will help change that. He has a plan to drive them to Delaware. He wants to increase the corporate tax from 7% to 8%, an increase of over 14% in that tax.

These evil companies are making too much money and the government wants its share of it. Disregarding all those millions of people that these companies have on the payrolls, it would be best if the state could get them to leave and we could transition these workers to government payrolls where they could keep a better eye on things.

We all know that the government is much more efficient in running services and companies. Just think about it. They could more easily calculate projected income taxes on their $45,000 calculators while sitting in their $75,000 chairs.

8) I heard that while he was sitting in the garage smoking dope with his naked guy friends, O'Malley came up with a great new idea - let's introduce slots in the state of Maryland!

O'Malley made this announcement the other day as one of his new plans. When WBAL's Scott Wychoff asked him why he opposed slots when he ran against Governor Bob Ehrlich, who was in favor of slots, O'Malley quipped, "That's political history. We're only interested in the future."

O'Malley reportedly then continued removing jars of KY jelly from the shelves of local stores.

One person even stated that he mumbled under his breath, "This is going to hurt the middle class so bad that it'll bring tears to their eyes and they won't be able to sit down for month!!! Moo-Ha-ha-ha!!!"

However, there is always a silver lining in every grey cloud. Unfortuantely for the people of Maryland, this silver lining is the toxic heavy metal called mercury. O'Malley states that he wants to reduce property taxes for the average families. His liberal math, though, is suspicious. The property tax will be reduced for 70% of the people, but it will be increased for the other 65%. This middle class is getting stiffed for this bill and you know it.

People who voted for O'Malley, you're getting what you deserve. Hold on tight to that bed post when you get your next tax statement.

Disease Outbreak at Schaefer Tower

A person working in the William Donald Schaefer tower in downtown Baltimore has contracted Legionnaires' disease, a deadly bacterial disease affecting the lungs. More than 1000 employees from various Maryland government agencies work in the tower. Fortunately, the person is being treated and has been released from the hospital.

Link to the article in the Baltimore Sun:
http://www.baltimoresun.com/news/health/bal-worker0823,0,3584878.story?coll=bal_tab01_layout

Fortunately, Governor Martin O'Malley has come to our rescue and told us that the tower is safe. Rumors spread quickly that he arrived at a press conference donning his red cape and Superman Underoos. However, this rumor was refuted when a young lady said that he was allowing the women to squeeze his biceps when he took off his shirt. Neither statement can be confirmed, but the O'Malley press office has not refuted the story either.

Details of the outbreak should become available later in the day or tomorrow. There has been no confirmation of the source of the outbreak, though I suspect that the Baltimore Sun's Jennifer Skalka and Michael Dressens will blame former Governor Robert Ehrlich. They will site Ehrlich's inability to increase the gas tax and the sales tax caused a revenue shortage that compromised the health, safety, and protection of our hard-working loyal government workers.