Vote No'Malley

Conjuntion Junction, What's Your Major Malfunction?

As promised, I have the update from this weekend's Maryland State Teacher's Convention. There are several members of my family that are teachers and we abuse the privilege and make a long weekend vacation out of it.

For the record, a close familiy member was also a teacher for about 21 years. He sure hated that job. He thought teaching was about helping kids learn. Everyone knows teaching is all about politics and towing the line. Another family member was a teacher and she said that you had to be registred as a Democrat or you did not get a job. That was just the way it was, or is.

This year I wore my newly acquired Ehrlich / Cox t-shirt. I knew this shirt would raise an eyebrow or two, especially from the teachers that can read. (just kidding!) The convention is always tainted with the poison of politics. Last year I had the honor of meeting and shaking hands with Doug Duncan. This was before the Baltimore Irish mafia got to him. You know the mafia - if you know what's best for you, you'll get depressed, drop out of the election and never run for office again.

Normally, the convention is filled booths manned with eager sales people and ex-teachers who know what's best. One year I had a 10 minute heated discussion about why I thought the annuities he was selling were horrible investments for retirement plans because you're forcing the teachers to pay for a death benefit that will not be received. The guy eventually told me to leave.

In addition, almost everyone there is a teacher and they all want to know where you teach. I attend as a guest, but few notice the 4"x6" lime green name tag that states "VISITOR". This year, I walked through the entire convention twice with only passing eye-eye contact glances. Most would look down at my shirt, shake their head, and not look me in the eyes. I felt violated! Is this how you women feel? Do people always want to know what your t-shirt says???

After being there an hour, I sat on a bench near the entrance. I man made eye contact with me from a distance and kept looking at me. He broke no smile or made no grimace. I was not sure what his intention was. He finally passed me, but a couple of seconds later there was a tap on my shoulder from behind. He extended his hand and said I was a brave sole for wearing that shirt and he wishes he had one, too. He then handed me a sticker that read, "Teacher Supported" and told me to apply it to my shirt and walk through the convention again.

I then walked proudly amongst the sea of liberals, my head held high, the sarcastic grin held back by the clenching of my teeth. Again, no smiles, no conversation, no 'Can I be your friend?'s. Finally I stood outside the main door to the big room waiting for the rest of the family to gather. A woman walked out of the convention wearing an O'Malley/Brown t-shirt. I cannot be certain, but think the smaller print on the back read, "Distract and Distort the facts from the women who think I'm cute."

I then caught this woman's eye. (actually, 'eyes'. She had 2 of them. Kind of a strange expression). She stopped in mid-stride and shook her head. The anger started boiling through her frizzy hair. Her shaking hands grabbed passers-by and she pointed to me. How dare someone wear a "Teacher Supported" sticker on an Ehrlich t-shirt at my convention!!! My brother-in-law and mother-in-law saw this display of anxiety and began laughing. A deer in headlights. What can she do to stop me?!!!

Shortly thereafter, another man came up to me and shook my hand and said that it takes a bold man to wear that shirt. I think I met both Republicans at the convention.

Uncivil Union

What draws teachers to the Dark Side of the Force? For one, all of the unions, NEA, MSTA, they all brainwash members to think Democrat. My sister-in-law said that she always votes for whomever the union tells her to vote. What kind of logic is that? If the union told her to pass all of her students even if they did not pass their tests...oh, wait, bad example.

Check out their endorsements. Not too many Republicans. And read their important issues and how the politicians voted. It's no wonder that they do not like Governor Bob Ehrlich. The MSTA is in favor of letting struggling schools continue failing the young children of Baltimore.

The MSTA is also failing their own members by refusing to accept any kind of raises by merit. In their eyes, all teachers should be paid the same for the amount of time worked. So Mrs. Incompentance 8-3pm gets paid the same as Mrs. Super Teacher 7-5pm. What is the incentive to do well? Everyone gets the same raise. If my job worked the same way, I would be sitting on my donkey memorizing the entire Internet while I was at work. Baltimore City schools have already proven the accountability is not an issue. Let's apply this to the whole state.

Funnies

Kelly Clarkson has a song out called Hazel Eyes. One of the verses reads:

Here I am, once again.
I'm torn into pieces.

My 4 year old son has changed the words to be sung:

Here I am, once again.
I want to go to recess.

Check out Weird Al Yankovich's song, White and Nerdy. This is really funny. Especially if you're white and nerdy. Not only do I deny the allegations, I deny the alligator.

BTW, today is Weird Al's birthday.

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