More New Baby

Baby Story Part 2

So as I mentioned before, my daughter was thrilled to get a sister, my son - not so thrilled. After making the announcement in the waiting room, I took my kids back to the room. My daughter's expression never changed. She went from thrilled to thrilled. My son, however, was immediately transformed into a little kid, no longer the youngest in the family, to a big brother, enthralled by the small size of his new little sister.

The next few hours were not too memorable. Family came to visit, friends came to visit. That night was filled with dim lights, intermittent sleep, and a continuous convoy of visiting nurses overcome with boredom, seeking to check the baby to fill their inactive night.

The night melted into daytime. The nurses' shifts changed, they introduced themselves, and took the vitals. I asked when breakfast was served. I was told 8:30. I wonder why they serve breakfast on bankers' hours. Or is it elementary school teachers' schedules? There was no way I was going to last until 8:30. I was forced to eat 3 bed sheets, 2 pillows, and 14 napkins. Fortunately, this held me over until 8:30.

That day we were visited by all the "experts". The house physician stopped by. She was very nice. She also mentioned that it was nice to visit a newborn who has a married mother and a father who is still involved in the relationship. Another plus was that we weren't teenagers. For a moment I thought I was in Baltimore City.

The last thing of our stay that stuck out in my mind was when the nurse came to debrief us before we left the hospital. She told my wife, "No sex for sex weeks", to which my wife responded, "you mean '1 year'?" The nurse laughed and said that "you'd be surprised. The 16 year old parents get really pissed off when you tell them that."

Come again? The 16 year old's shouldn't even be in the maternity ward unless it's to see the birth o their parent's "accidental & irresponsible night of passion" souvenir love child. There I go showing my age again.

Oh, Baby, where's that baby?

My wife is now 38 weeks pregnant. We're (mostly she) is at the point that we just want the baby to be born. My son was almost 9 lbs when he was born. My wife, who is 5'2" and 105 lbs with her shoes on, practically got stretched inside-out giving birth to him.

When she went to the doctor after she got pregnant, the doctor told her that she probably wouldn't want her to go much beyond 37 weeks because the baby would be too big and she didn't want her to go through another tough pregnancy.

Well, here we are at 38 weeks. My wife went to the doctor yesterday, fully expecting them to schedule an induction later this week. However, the doctor was like, "Looks like you're doing fine. You're 6 cm dilated. See you next week. Oh, can you pass me that crack pipe?"

My wife was furious, and not about the crack pipe. She explained her concerns - having a large baby, tough labor, her absolute misery in trying to get around, not being able to sleep comfortably. The doctor's reaction was something like, "I understand, can you please pass the crack pipe?" Seriously, the doctor said if they induce they can get in trouble? Trouble? With who? The insurance company? Are we letting under-paid accountants make medical decisions again? I thought we learned our lesson when they invented HMO's. They're going to be in more trouble if they determine my wife needs a c-section because the baby is too big. I'm sure Steven L. Miles would like to sue them for negligence and malpractice. Let's talk about it.

Anyway, my wife gets angrier. She says she's going to schedule next week's appointment for late in the week, because what's the point of coming every 7 days if all the doc is going to say is, "That's nice, have you seen my razor and mirror?"

So last night, she starts to have several bursts of contractions. However, nothing came about. She woke up this morning, several pounds heavier, a few hours less sleep, interupted by several dreams of the doctor stealing spoons and lighters out of all of her patient's purses.

Will keep you updated!

Where's the Blogger

I realize that my posts have decreased significantly. And there's good reason. First, as I mentioned in my previous post, I was on vacation. On my first day back after the vacation, I started a new position in the company. That significantly decreased my time as I can't just blog in the middle of the day if I want to. Gotta keep up some semblance of a good work ethic.

So why don't I blog at night? Well, my wife is 38 weeks pregnant. Have you ever slept in the same bed as a pregnant woman? There's not much sleep going on. Tossing. Turning. Thrusting of pillows into different positions. And it's all my fault, of course. It's all I can do in the evening to get my kids into bed at a reasonable time, clean up some of the house, get my lunch ready, iron my clothes for the next day, watch a couple of Netflix movies during the week, and go to bed.

My wife went to the doctor today. She is now 7cm dilated and the baby's head is resting up against the cervix. For those of you who went to Baltimore City Public Schools, this means that the lady is getting ready to give birth. She could have the baby this weekend, which is not good. Dr. Creepy is on call this weekend. Plus he's a guy. I think it's safe to say that ladies prefer giving birth with the help of lady doctors, not dude doctors.

So the plan is if the baby is not born on its own by Monday, she will be induced on Tuesday. And then I get 5 days off!!! Oh, wait...